My plan was to go home to my parents (since I feel that I really have no choice), stop taking Lexapro so that I could get really depressed again, and then commit suicide. I know, I know. It's horrible to think that way, but many times I feel that Death is my only friend; I trust Death more than I trust anyone and I know that it will stop my everlasting pain.
Tomorrow I will go to CAPS (counseling and psychological services) and talk to someone. I'm hanging in there, but it also seems like there is no more hope. I'm trying though.